Look, we all deal with this every day, but it might be worse for social media professionals because we live in the online world. We see the absolute perfection of other people’s lives and we start wondering… What is wrong with us? Why aren’t we that perfect?
The amount that we doubt ourselves because we can’t live up to that perfection is horrific. But it doesn’t matter if we keep reminding ourselves that we are comparing our lives with someone else’s highlight reels. I know that I personally start wondering if my life’s highlight reels could even compare to those that I see online. Honestly, it’s not likely. I’m a homebody that likes a quiet life a little too much.
So how do we combat all of this perfection that is constantly thrust upon us from all sides on social media? I don’t know that I have the right formula, but here’s how I do it.
Meet with real people regularly
Like I said, I’m a homebody. But I understand that the more I stay in my little bubble of a happy home, the more the perfection posts are going to get to me. I will lose sight of what is real and what is not. And frankly, very few of those posts are real.
So I make sure I get to my running group at least once a week, preferably twice. I get my daughter to all of her activities and playdates. And I try to socialize with the other parents as much as I awkwardly can. I also constantly put myself in situations where I might meet someone new. For someone who is introverted, this is the definition of my hell, but I feel so much better because I do this.
The perfection posts start bouncing right off of me. Who cares about me? I’m surrounded by great people who I enjoy, so there might be something good about me. And that’s a much better jumping off point than to wonder why I’m not so perfect.
Get rid of the perfection accounts
The world sucks in so many ways and you’re not in control of a lot of it. But you are in control of what your social media use is like. If an account makes you feel bad, unfollow it. Even if the reason why it’s making you feel bad is because it’s so perfect, it’s okay to unfollow it. No one is going to know.
What is coming through on your social media feeds should bring you joy. It should aid in your mental wellness, not making you mentally ill. So if you consistently find yourself feeling bad after engaging with social media, change who you are following and what videos you watch. And be ruthless about this. Your mental health is too important.
Find more ways to engage in the real world
There was a time I was engaged in the social media world from the time that my eyes opened in the morning to the second my head hit the pillow at night. I consider that one of my least interesting times of life, and I’m pretty sure I was out of touch with reality. Social media has a tendency to reward the loudest voice, so you end up thinking that’s what everyone thinks. That’s not so great when it comes to how you live your life. (I’m not going to admit to exactly how many times I’ve texted friends asking if something is real thanks to social media, but it’s been a lot.)
Then I took up crocheting. The thing about crocheting is that it uses your hands, so you’re not able to endlessly scroll on social media. And that gives me loads of time to let my mind to wander around problems and writing projects. My God, all of that helped my mental health.
Am I telling you to pick up a hook and go to town? Yes, but I’m pretty sure crocheting is not for everyone. Find an activity that makes it impossible to scroll and forces you to be in another world. Running or any kind of exercise is another great one that could improve your mental health in a lot of ways. Whatever it is, make sure it keeps your hands busy and your mind on what is actually right in front of you.
Do some inner work
This can sound a little hokey, but it’s super important that you protect your mental health ahead of time. And I’ve found the best way to do that is to do the inner work.
What is inner work? It can be a lot of things. I used to write what I was thankful for in the morning and evening. That was enough to help me re-evaluate how I felt about my life. It can be meditation. I use a kind of meditation that allows me to practice certain feelings so I can be more effective at dealing with them when they actually occur. It can be exercise. I know I feel a little bulletproof after a good workout session. Basically, whatever is going to make you mentally stronger is considered inner work.
Whatever you choose, I would try to do it at least most days. Taking some quiet time where you focus just on you is going to make you stronger in the long run. And that will help those perfection posts roll right off your back.
How do you handle those perfection posts? Do they bother you?